We Keep On Waiting

And..................we wait......

In the meantime, here's my update on Jolynn who hit Day Plus 100 six days ago, a traditional milestone for bone marrow transplant patients.  The OHSU team continues to deliver great news about her bloodwork results at her weekly visits to the Knight Cancer Center at Portland's waterfront.  The security in that building has hit a new high, completely forbidding me to even get on the elevator or wait in the lobby so she goes to her appointments by herself.  We've been worried about her weekly weight loss, likely due to her acute GVHD issues but the liquid steroid is helping her stomach welcome food.  Her task:  Consume Calories!  This morning's grocery delivery will bring many flavors of her non dairy ice cream and lots of yummy treats to help her put weight on.  And it's working.....yesterday's clinic visit delighted us with the news that she has GAINED 6 POUNDS!  Wooooohooooo!  As she eats her non-dairy Ben and Jerry's chocolate ice cream, we wait for her results of the bone marrow biopsy.  Expecting more good news!

I, on the other hand, am trying NOT to consume calories. 
Yeah, right.

Looking out the windows for tidbits of gratefulness.  The birds are gobbling up the food in their window feeder and the deep purple Irises are standing tall with Miracle Gro in their thankful roots.  A dozen Extremely Fragrant bare root roses from Heirloom are on their way to our English gardens so I'm perusing the yard, gleefully looking for a homesite for each rose.  Cub has relocated to our Portland address and her double bagger behind my seat brings me joy. The vase of spectacular pink Lillies sent to us for Mother's Day from Hannah and Alex still permeate the kitchen.  Bear and I gently swing on the big blue saucer swing in the backyard while I tell him how much I love his sweet face.  Trish pops in occasionally to sit on the deck under the gigantic Wisteria with us and often she will vacuum the downstairs just for the hell of it.  Mary and Ryan stopped over with adorable 11 month old Rory last weekend and we hung out in the freshly mowed back yard.  We hired Ken to help with a task in the vein of getting the farm property ready to sell and that was a productive day....... waiting for the farm to find a buyer.  A good friend of Jolynn's sent us beautiful homemade masks in the mail from San Diego while we wait for .... I don't know what ....  a vaccine? The groceries? The biopsy results? The roses?  Motivation to keep writing?

November?
  ha

Finding gratitude in the interim.  Our amazing HC turned 30 a few days ago and in just a few short months, she will graduate with her masters degree in NYC.  I had to cancel my plans to be there for her birthday and I won't be able to fly there for her graduation and that is the outrage that I'm trying to console with gratitude for bare root roses and Bear's sweet face. 

And all the while, we are waiting, waiting, waiting on the world to change.....

                                                          John Mayer
                               https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oBIxScJ5rlY

Fire!

That's three years of pruning debris on our two acre farm property, going up in smoke.  Rural counties have "burn days" and yesterday was one of them so we took the opportunity to get rid of the huge pile of brush and branches in an attempt to get the property ready to be put on the market.

Okay.  Have your opinion about it.  Whatever.  Be careful up there on the mountain top, in a glass house.....everyone has a rock in their hand in this firestorm society as we wait for the winds to change direction.

It's May 1st.  May Day.  May Day.
We are hunkered down in the blaze of the quarantine..  I've mastered the art of ordering groceries simultaneously from 2 different stores.  No, I'm not overstocking.  We have all sorts of diet restrictions in this household so it's tricky to get what we want....."you can't always get what you want....but if you try sometime, you find you get what you need..."  Love that Rolling Stones song. Just love it. 
Here it is for the hell of it:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jv9sDn_2XkI

So, I'm just burning to tell you the news that Jolynn is still doing well!!  Her counts and numbers and bells and whistles are clamoring for the new normal.  A liquid steroid helps her stomach issues, which helps with weight gain.  She is at Day Plus 92 today......the honored day of Day Plus 100 is next Saturday, May 9th...marking a milestone for Bone Marrow Transplant patients.  May is Jolynn's month.  Her birthday is on Monday; then there's Day Plus 100 and then there's Mother's Day! So many reasons to step up, step out and smell the Lilacs! 

And the Wisteria.
And the Honeysuckle.
And the Roses.
And all of those other luscious flowers in our English gardens at our new home in Bean Town.

How I worship my flowers........  While some are protesting so that they can go back to the taverns and be exposed to a deadly virus (yes, please do), some of us are content to let the smoke clear and loll and bask in the tranquility of solitude and pretty petals. 

Closing off the raging stupidity, I give myself a break from headlines.  I have to practice restraint from a full blown rant.  The sweet, innocent faces of our pups snap me back to joy and gratefulness while I contemplate patience and why I need more of it. 

Meanwhile, my little wildfire sweetheart in the big apple continues to recover.... good grief, what a year this has been so far...and it's only May. 



                                                        The Pointer Sisters!
                                   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rarro42uIVU